Frenemy Jane, the Sometimes Friend (Hardcover)
Have you ever felt like you’re riding a wave? Day to day, you don’t know how your friend will behave? Join us as we tackle the issue of a sometimes friend. Nice one day, not so nice the next!
Talking about ‘frenemies’ (a friend who is more like an enemy) is a particularly painful and dreaded subject for me. I’ve mentioned in the past that I grew up with a mother that would befriend others who would put her down. Whether it was lack of self-esteem or learned behavior, it put me in an awkward position of feeling like I had to defend her when it was close to impossible. It clouded my own judgement in making friends as I grew up. I thought I had beaten the entire ‘frememy issue’ long ago then I had another dreaded ‘ah-ha’ moment in motherhood when, during a difficult period with post-partum depression, I started to sink into a very dark place where I started to question myself about everything. I reached out to people who I, if I had been thinking clearly, knew were damaging to me for encouragement and friendship. The results were, of course, disastrous – but this time (after re-grouping) I was ready to face it head on after the depression started to lift and do some damage control quickly. I did not want to repeat that same cycle with my kids watching.
Friendships aren’t designed to help feed or hurt our esteem, they are supposed to be easy relationships that are (mostly) fun, supportive, and engaged. Not everyone is meant to be your friend and that is okay. We don’t have to parent our friends or expect different results if they have a bullying mentality and I have learned to cut my losses. I have found life is easier when you steer clear of negativity while being congenial to ‘frenemies’, and that doesn’t mean you have to put up with any jabs or nonsense from those around you. Sure, you may lose these ‘sometimes’ friends, but you form a closer bond to those who are actually great friends. I learned a long time ago, I don’t need a ton of people in my life to make me content, I just need a few people who are great friends. I thought it was such an important subject that I wanted to talk to my oldest daughter about through a wonderful book called Frenemy Jane, the Sometimes Friend.
Frenemy Jane, the Sometimes Friend is about a little girl named, Maddie, who has a “friend” named Jane. They have been friends since preschool but as they grow older, Jane starts saying things to Maddie that are not nice. In fact, her ‘friend’ is behaving more like a bully without Maddie understanding it. After all, Jane isn’t bigger, stronger or using physical force to harm Maddie, she is using words. Not everyone realizes that is just as damaging. Maddie starts to question their friendship without knowing what to do. Thankfully, Maddie and her mother were able to have a nice long talk about friendship when her mother noticed things between her and Jane were not right. Maddie was able to go to school with confidence knowing that her frenemy friendship could not continue and knew a good way to face it. Friends who are mean to you are not real friends and you don’t have to put up with their behavior. It’s a great lesson in self esteem, friendship, and self-worth and this book should help children who are dealing with their own issues with a frenemy on how to handle the situation.
Charity! A portion of the proceeds from Frenemy Jane, the Sometimes Friend goes to the anti-bullying campaign through PACER’s National Bullying Prevention Center. You can find out more about them here.
“Count your blessings, not your problems.”
Frenemy Jane, the Sometimes Friend (Hardcover)
List Price: $ 14.95
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